The road to recovery

Last night had a few unpleasantries in store for me. Coughing is becoming less frequent, but has not entirely subsided yet, and is certainly still uncomfortable, but then there is the product of the cough. There is really only two possibilities when nasal congestion or coughing produces a mouth full of mucous. Neither is actually polite conversation, but then you are not reading my blog for that, you are reading it to know what it's like for me to go through bariatric surgery (and other general aspects of life) and sometimes what happens is just not polite.  Most of my phlegm of late has be deposited into tissues, then trashcans. Some out car windows or on to the grassy area near sidewalks, but as I'm trying to pass out in bed last night at 2 in the morning, I was going with option two... until option two got full.  There just isn't enough volume in my stomach to swallow much snot right now, and while trying to fall asleep I hit the limit.  I didn't quite get sick, but I was certain I shouldn't even swallow down my saliva for awhile and I got up and spent some time in the bathroom in case I didn't keep it down, and to give me a place to deposit further slimeballs.

While in there I emptied my bladder to another awkward surprise. For the first time in my life I experienced dick-farts. I warned you this wasn't going to be polite. As I was finishing my steam tapered and waned as expected, and at the end there was a sputtering as I peed air.  I knew gas in my system was causing me problems, but I had not yet considered every means for it's escape yet. That caught me completely off guard. It wasn't until almost 4 when I finally passed out in my armchair. My wife didn't say anything to me about it, but I think she was a little resentful that I wasn't more help in the morning before she took the boys in to daycare at noon.

Today was the first day I could start adding stuff to my intake, my wife had bought me some smooth, low-fat Greek yogurt, one of the suggested foods, and my first few spoonfuls were quite delightful. It was vanilla flavored, and it occurred to me that I still had minimum protein goals and my protein powder was also vanilla. So I mixed in a bout 1/4 serving of protein powder.  Much less tasty then. The two vanillas were not compatible. But 3-4 spoonfuls was all I was going to accomplish anyway, so I foiled up the top and put it back in the fridge.

Got out and about some today. I haven't taken my Rx pain meds since Wednesday, and I can turn plenty well enough to check my blind spots, so I took the van out and deposited a check we had, ran into the Independence Costco and replaced my hair trimmer since OP didn't have any left and buying them at Costco is still cheaper than a haircut. Went to a Halmark store and got my darling wife a Valentines card that I thought she'd appreciate. Then came home and buzzed my clown hairdo back to a normal bald-guy cut and reshaped my beard.  I wasn't done cleaning up the bathroom yet when the wife and kiddos got home.  The two year old was in a constant state of pestering Mom for some of the candy he got at school today, once she was the slightest bit settled in, she acquiesced to a single dose of sugar, and when the begging was reestablished moments later, she insisted the next dose would not be administered prior to dinner.

The boy was displeased by this response. To help redirect his energy I got his shoes and coat back on him and we ambled around the block talking extensively about trees and trucks and fire hydrants. When we returned home I directed him to the back yard where I pushed him on his swing until the chill and dark were enough for me and I told him it was time to go inside again.  He conned me into waiting long enough for him to take a trip down the slide first, then we went in where Mom was almost done making a big old pot of mac & cheese (semi-from-scratch) and some spanikopita.  I made about a third of a packet of instant oatmeal, plain. Not fair, is it.


 I decided that since 1% milk hit my "okay" list today, that I'd pick some up to mix up my protein drinks and oatmeal.  Also decided I would make my Wifey a nice romantic dinner for one tomorrow for Valentines night, and was going to pick up some asparagus spears as a side to the salmon fillet.  So after we put the 2 year old to bed for the first time, I went out to the grocery store. My okay list also includes pureed fruit, so I picked up blueberries and strawberries and some per-pureed gerber prunes... hey someone's got to poop again some day, ya know?

When I got to the milk isle I wasn't certain I was feeling like a whole gallon would be in order... So I was looking at the quarts and half gallons, and I noticed the local, hormone free, Shatto brand of milk there in the glass bottles.  I know a few people who advocate for that brand of milk, but I was feeling a little frugal so I went back to looking at the A&E, Highland Dairy, and Price Chopper brands... and soon realized that the Shatto was the cheaper choice, too. I bought 2 pints. I sipped one on the trip home.  It tasted like milk... not like the nothing some other milks taste like, this had milk flavor to it. I'm pretty darned happy with my choice.

There's a rumbley in my tumbly.

One thing I did not expect from my surgery was all of the gas. It is the source of the majority of my discomfort. Today, in addition to belching, I have added farting to my gas relief repertoire, which I'm lead to believe is a good sign following any surgery involving the digestive system. Even so, the combination of these two activities has been insufficient to provide any lasting relief. How much air is inside of me, anyway? Luckily though, today did mark the day that urination stopped stinging, so that was a blessing.

My weigh-in today was a dramatic downward shift, landing me at 336.6.

Keeping my 2 year old from using me as a jungle gym is going to be a challenge. He's used to a lot of lap time, and playing horsey and things I just can't do right now, and though we explain it, I don't think he really understands... but in due time I will be able to play more actively with him than I ever could have before. The time is coming boy, just be patient.

Nearly forgot my blood thinner shot tonight.  They ain't so bad.  I really don't even feel the tiny needle going in. 2 down, 5 to go for those.

Tomorrow I can begin adding a few things to my intake.  I can start using protein shakes again, and I can make them with milk if I want. I can have smooth, lite yogurt and Greek yogurt - without fruit chunks. I can have babyfood. I can have cream-based soups after they've been strained, and I can have runny oatmeal.  Add that to my clear liquids and you have my diet for the next week. I am looking forward to week two when I can have an egg, cottage cheese, or refried beans as well.

Shave his Belly with a Rusty Razor.

When I weighed in today after coming home from the hospital. I  was 5 lbs heaver then when I went in...  They removed 90% of one of my organs, I consumed nothing for 36 hours, and I put on weight... That's so unfair!  I realize the swollen tissues are holding on to extra water and as the swelling subside the water weight will flush out and I'll get a more accurate weigh in... but still.

After dropping the boys off with my Sis and Dad down at my parents place, Mom my wife and I headed off to hospital - we got there about 20 minutes before they asked us to show up, but they got me checked right in and I lumped summed my estimated out-of-pocket expenses after insurance. Was about $685. I'll still have to pay the anesthesiologist separately, and owe for the psychiatric evaluation yet. All of my follow up appointments will have a co-pay too... but all told it's a lot better than paying out-of-pocket for the entire procedure!

I'm told I was in the surgery room about an hour, about 30 minutes of that was actual surgery, the other half was involving putting me under and waking me up. Then I was in a recovery room for another 45 minutes or so, then they moved me to a patient room. My wife stayed with me most of the day, and Mom, Dad, Sis and my Nephews and sons were all there at some point... but the painkillers they had me on meant I kept dozing off.  I'm glad they were there, but feel guilty I didn't interact with them a little more, or let them know they were appreciated.

I still have my phlegm-producing cough, now with abdominal wounds, that sucks quite a lot. In the hospital it got to the point where if I thought a cough was coming, I'd try to fight it off and press my little self-dose pain button so that once I did go, I'd feel it less.

They shaved my belly prior to surgery.  I kept thinking of that verse from "What Do You Do With a Drunken Sailor?"  It's already stubbly now.  It's going to itch as it grows back in. grumble.

Also, my stretchmarks were pulled taught, and opened up, and some new one formed, etc... which felt weird to see since I'm down nearly 50 lbs from 2 weeks ago and THEN get new stretchmarks, but oh well.

The first nurse to take my blood for labs mentioned something about having a perfect record so far, until missing my vein. She had to get the more experienced nurse in to do it.  2nd nurse had no trouble at all "Well look at that gusher! you may be my new favorite patient!"

With the exception of some acute moments like coughing or bending too far, my soreness has been much less than things I had done to myself in the past - like recovering from the ab workouts during the first week of swim season each year, or even some of the ab days in Karate class.

This was my first experience with a catheter. 3 or 4 people mentioned that with a catheter in you always feel like you need to pee... I didn't really experience that. When it came to removing it the nurse warned be that getting all that tape off of my hairy inner thigh would be the worst part... then RIIIP. and to her amazement I didn't really flinch at that.  Then she used a syringe to remove the fluid from the balloon in the catheter that held it in place, and reminded me to breath while she pulled it out.  The reminder did no good, and she lied about the tape being the worst part. My brain refused to allow breathing to happen for the second and half that tube was being pulled out of me at 5am today... and since then peeing has be uncomfortable. This has made me so very glad I never contracted Chlamydia.

Removing the catheter was probably the least pleasant moment of the hospital stay, and a close second was when they removed the drain tube from my side. Having that rubbery hose slide out through a hole in your body that didn't exist the day before is an unsettling, discomfortable experience.

Much of the discomfort I'm having in my belly has to do with gas.  Belching has become a new pastime.

After the wifey took me home, she left again to fill my prescriptions. Turns out the Pharmacy where I work did not have nearly enough Hydrocodone Bitartrate and Acetaminophen oral solution to fill that script, we had them call the other 3 pharmacies we run in this market, and still a no go.  There is a grocery store that our insurance will give us a break on, though if we need to use their pharm, and one of their locations had enough on hand... Seems like it was an odd amount to perscirbe though, I got one full bottle that the pharmacy usually divides into smaller bottles for patients, and 25ml more in a separate bottle.  Ironically it's labeled "Take with food."

I'm on an all clear-liquid diet today and tomorrow. I really didn't feel up to eating anything today anyway, so that's been fine.

I assume it must be somehow related, but after I was at home for several hours this morning, I got the first nosebleed I've had in many years. As a matter of fact, I cannot recall having a nose bleed that could not be contributed to being hit in the face.  It subsided after about 2 minutes or so, but it was odd.

Bending over to change my 2 year old's diaper tonight sent a sharp pain through one of the incision sites. It prompted me to take a dose of my pain meds.  In addition to those, I have a blood thinner I inject into my bellyfat daily for a week. Nausea tablets that one dissolves under their tongue, and an daily stomach acid controller - an Rx version of Prilosec, they say.

I think the Hydrocodone is trying to put me to sleep... or maybe it just late and I didn't get much sleep with them checking my vitals every 2 hrs last night... either way, I'm going to hit the hay.

I'm not lying anymore...

This morning my nekkid weight was 350.6 lbs. My driver's license  is accurate for the first time in about half a decade. Well see what my clothed weight is at the Dr.s office and how it compares to my 397 back on Jan 26. It's 7:20 here now, and everything is running a little ahead of my itinerary at the moment, so that's good, too.

Timeline

T-minus 12 hrs 'till dissection.
I should be asleep now... but I just ain't feeling it, ya know?

Thought today: when somebody seems amazed at how well I'm doing after surgery, I'm going to say "It takes more than being stabbed in the gut 5 times and having one of my internal organs carved out to slow ME down!" We'll see how often I can work that one into conversations.

You run and you run to catch up to the sun, but it's sinking

Itenerary working backwards...
-Surgery starts at 11:00 am.
-I need to be there by 9:45 am.
Google says 30 minutes drive time from parents house to the hospital w/o traffic...
-Leave parents house by 9:05 am
Dropping the kiddos with Beba and Papa and getting their well-wishes and stuff will probably take at least 10 min
-Be at 'rents house by 8:55 am.
Driving from my place to the 'rents through the Grandview Triange... a.k.a. the SKCCF...40 minutes.
-Leave home by 8:15 am
45 minutes to get the 2 year old awake, fed, and dressed to leave. During which time we can prep the 3 mo. old...
-Start wrangling kids by 7:30 am.
10 minutes to get self dressed in loose fitting clothes
-Out of shower & dried off by 7:20 am
20 min Shower with special pre-surgery soap
-In shower by 7:00 am.
Snoozing and slowly waking from the sleep of the dead takes about 20 min.
-Set alarm for 6:40 am
wouldn't hurt to be running 10 minutes early
-Set alarm for 6:30 am instead...

Hmmm.  well then... I have to have a pre-surgery-super-soap shower tonight before bed too...

All of the sudden I am feeling a little more sleepy than I thought.  I think I'll shower and hit the hay.

Pause

So yeah, dropping 30 lbs in a little more than a week is cool and all, but when you don't lose anything from one day to the next, it's a minor disappointment when you're a fat guy not eating anything at all. I was looking at my weight loss rate and was thinking things like "I'll actually weigh what my driver's license says I do by the time I have surgery," and things like that. Then I weighed in at 359.8 ... not at all bad accept the day before was 359.6.  My disappointment was too mild to note, until the next day when I stepped on the scale and it read 359.8, again. Bummer.  I tried mentioning to my wife that stalling sucks after POUNDS every day for weeks, but the sympathy well was dry. "30 pounds in a week!" she responded. The next day... still 359... getting grumpy about it.

Last night I dreamt about realizing I was accidentally cheating on my liquid-only diet after snacking, then going "Oh, well! screw it!" and binging for the rest of the day. It was gloriously grotesque gluttony.

This morning I woke up 4 minutes before my alarm because I had to head to the restroom. After being attacked by my bowels for 15 minutes... I weighed in today at 352.6.  I may make it down to my DL weight of 350 by surgery after all.

Why is it possible to be stopped up and have a runny nose at the same time? The sore throat and dry-but-phlegm-producing cough are getting pretty old too. Is it feed a cold and starve the flu or feed the flu and starve a cold-oh wait... I last ate 12 days ago and wont eat anything I can chew again for  10 more days yet... then I can try a soft-cooked egg, non-fat refried beans, or cottage cheese. Hmm, chewing there is still optional... lets look further ahead. In 18 days I can begin trying to work foods I would chew back into my diet.  I should mark my calendar.

Meanwhile, I think my 2 year old is trying to skip meals now because Daddy isn't eating. But buddy-boy, how am I supposed to live vicariously through you if neither of us are eating?  I think I'm going to go play some pac-man.

Photo Throwdown!

I need to put my ass-kicking boots on!

My photolab no longer has the equipment to develop film into negatives.  I can print from negatives and I can digitize them and save them to a disc (16Base Resolution 2048 x 3072). If you come to me with a roll of film, I send you to one of two local, independently owned photo labs that do good work. It costs more than we used to, but it's how they have been able to afford to keep offering that service when it was no longer cost effective for us.

Today, a customer returns from having visited one of these two labs and lets me know that the worker there was bad-mouthing the work we do.  Not only that, but spreading falsehoods about it. My customer had her film processed there but was going to have it digitized with us because we charge a pittance of what the independent lab does for the same resolution scan. Their staff member asked her if she was going to bring us her film and she affirmed that she was. Then the employee told her when we scan negatives we destroy them afterwards instead of returning the film. (Not True) My customer said if she had the scans she couldn't care if she got her negatives back, she was using us anyway. Then the employee misinformed my customer that we send them off to China to be scanned. (Ridiculous) I think she has my company confused with a different, less wholesome, retail giant. After all the work I've sent them, and with all the effort we put into producing a quality product, I expect more respect from the workers there.

AAMOF this post is now a few days late because instead of polishing it up and posting it, I sent an E-mail to the owner of the little independent photo lab...  He responded that their employee meant no malice, and was working under misinformation.  Furthermore he personally loves shopping at our place and finds folk there friendly and helpful.